First Day Back to School

As we begin another school year there is excitement in the air. I remember that feeling as a child, the nervous energy, not sure who your teacher will be, glad to see your friends again, but dreading those tough kids who would call people names, and get into fights.


All summer the kids have been able to immerse themselves in things they wanted to do, whether that be church camps, sports camps or just hanging out with friends. With the technology today they are able to keep in touch with friends whenever and where ever.

There is an interesting dynamic that often occurs at this time of year. Everyone is new, some-times new school, new opportunities for kids to be who they want to be and not who others see you as.

The first day comes and all the kids dress in their best clothes from the best stores…others under the guise that they “Don’t care what others say” wear old, dirty clothes but in reality they do so because that is what identifies them or they just can’t afford what is tready.

As the kids walk onto the school grounds, whether that be play ground or parking lot, they are being judged, at least in their own mind. There will be kids who just want to be seen, they will be loud and the confidence they project will be their cover for very real fear of being seen. Other will just want to be invisible, not because they are afraid of being themselves, on the contrary they are comfortable in their own skin. However there will be others in the crowd who really are not that comfortable and as a way to take attention away from that they will tear these kids down to make themselves look better, stronger, smarter. They follow the motto that if at first you don’t succeed try, try again to break this person down.

It can start simple enough like taking something, a pencil or pen, something small just to show that they are in control. Then it can escalate into a cool “Nick-name” for you that is not very cool. Then when that no longer bothers the person maybe it becomes more physical a push, punch or kick as they walk by. Each hour of each day brings a repeated act of dominance that is designed to show who is in control.

This is the life a “Target” of bullying faces. Notice I did not say “Victim”? No one is a victim, unless you give in and give up.

The way to counter this cycle is to develop more leaders. The more leaders we have in society the less room there will be for bullies, and all things negative. This is an easy process, but it has 5 pieces to the puzzle.

Parents (everything starts at home), Teachers (during the next 10 months no-one sees the kids more than teachers), “Targets” of bullying, the “Bully”, the “On-lookers”, who neither take part in or defend against the bullying.

Over the course of the next few weeks, we will jump into ways for each of these participants to become leaders and what that will look like.